


Small Talk

by entanglednow



Category: The Big Bang Theory
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-11-29
Updated: 2009-11-29
Packaged: 2017-10-15 13:03:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 454
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/161066
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/entanglednow/pseuds/entanglednow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Leonard and Penny teach Sheldon the art of small talk</p>
            </blockquote>





	Small Talk

"Say something about the weather," Penny says firmly.

Sheldon stares at both her and Leonard, like they might be playing some sort of elaborate joke on him.

"Why?"

"It establishes commonality in a way that's impersonal and non-threatening," Leonard explains from the other chair.

Sheldon turns so that he's facing Penny.

"The temperature and air pressure are appropriate to the season, when taken from an overall mean," he hazards. Which Penny suspects is a Sheldon-appropriate version of 'umm.'

"Yeah, something with less words in it," Penny tells him with a nod.

Sheldon sighs, in a way that says in no uncertain terms that removing words is no way to improve a sentence. Penny makes a 'come on,' gesture and he presses his mouth tight and obviously tries to think of a way to make his thoughts smaller. It looks like it hurts.

"It is not entirely inclement today," he tries, then goes for some sort of expression, though Penny doesn't have the faintest idea what he's trying for there. It's less 'escaped mental patient,' than his first attempt so, hey, they're getting somewhere.

Penny has no idea what a clement is, or if it's good, it sounds like some sort of citrus fruit, but Leonard smiles at him like that worked so she pulls a face that's pleased and nods right along with him.

"That was good, now wait for me to say something back, something like..." she waves a hand while she thinks about it. "It feels warmer than it did yesterday.'"

"Do you have evidence of that? I think you'll find -"

Penny holds up a hand, makes an unhappy noise. "Sweetie, what did we say about lecturing during small talk?"

"That we don't do it," Sheldon says carefully, and now he looks irritated, like he's failed some sort of important test.

"You don't crush people's sense of self-worth until you _know_ them better," Leonard tells him helpfully.

Penny smacks Sheldon on the knee. "Try again."

Sheldon's quiet for a handful of seconds, Penny likes to think he's rifling through his collection of words and tossing out all the ones that are wrong.

"Remember, opinions and observations," Leonard offers helpfully.

Sheldon seems to have decided on something, Penny recognises the weird little half smile he gets when he's about to dazzle them with his brain.

"The low pressure seems to indicate a sixty to seventy percent chance of rain," he offers carefully

Penny has to make her impressed face, even Leonard looks surprised. Because for Sheldon that's pretty good.

"Your clothes will be insufficient protection should that occur," he adds.

Penny raises an eyebrow at him.

"Yeah, I think you went somewhere slightly creepy there," Penny tells him.

"Baby steps," Leonard reminds her.


End file.
